September 8, 2018

What Forgiveness is Not

“And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off?” – Luke 18:7 Many of us have a misunderstanding about what forgiveness is, so the thought of letting go of the wrongs done to us sounds awful, even painful. However, it’s important to know that when we talk about not holding onto offense, we are not pretending that nothing ever happened. I talked to my mentor (who’s also a therapist), Bill Gaultiere, about this years ago, and he shared with me three things that forgiveness is not. I think it’s important to understand these before we talk about what forgiveness really is. First of all, forgiveness is not excusing. Being merciful doesn’t mean that you look for a way to let the other person out of the wrong they have done. It’s not saying, “well,

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