At the heart of becoming emotionally healthy and bonding deeply with others is knowing that you are desired and loved, not that you are rotten and sinful. Imagine that there’s a courthouse in Heaven with lots of people in it and everybody is looking at the judge. You’re on trial and the prosecutor is the mangy old devil, the accuser of the brethren. He’s the district attorney and he’s pointing at you saying, “Your Honor, she is addicted to pain pills and she’s really jealous of the lady at her job, and she’s mean to her kids, and by the way, did you hear what she said to her sister?” You feel helpless because you have no way to answer except guilty. Just then, Jesus, your attorney, stands up before the judge and says, “No Your Honor, she’s forgiven, she’s chosen, she’s justified, and she is the righteousness of God. The price has been paid and this is a done deal.” After such a profound pardon, would you interrupt Him and say, “No Your Honor, He’s right. I deserve to be punished?” Probably not, but very often we undermine the authority of Jesus and the decree of righteousness He has spoken over our lives in a similar manner.
Friend, don’t try to undo the good that Jesus is doing in your life by bullying yourself and beating yourself up. That is not the Gospel. The reality is that when we were lost in our sin and totally outside the Kingdom of God, He made a way that can’t be undone. You are worthy of love and belonging just as you are, not as you should be.